Why is acceptance so important?

Contrary to what’s implied in Western societies, acceptance doesn’t mean resignation. It’s simply the best alternative to suffering. Acceptance is a strength; indeed, life becomes much easier when you stop expecting and start accepting.

Being overly controlling lowers your happiness because it often results in anger, frustration and disappointment when others don’t behave the way you want them to or when things don’t turn out like you want them to. When pursuing your passions, you should do so in a harmonious way, not an obsessive way, as the latter makes people less happy and successful and eventually leads to burn-out.

Perception of control is crucial for our happiness. As John Milton rightly puts it, « the mind can make heaven out of hell and hell out of heaven », meaning we can change our feelings by changing our thoughts. This certainly takes time and practice, but when we believe that something is written – Maktoub – we accept that it must be for the best! Sufi poet Rumi encourages us to “live life as if everything was rigged in our favor”.

Because one thing is sure – life is unpredictable and everything changes, hence the importance of learning to accept whatever comes our way and embrace it. Of course, life can bring many challenges such as the death of a loved one or a missed opportunity, which are very hard to cope with. Cultivating acceptance is a lifelong journey and the sooner we start, the better able we’ll be to deal with what’s coming our way in the future.

According to Deepak Chopra, accepting things as they are in the present moment is the only way to keep a peaceful state of mind and to avoid being miserable and struggling. This doesn’t mean that we’re not allowed to want things to be different in the future, but choosing to believe that everything happens for a reason and that better things will follow is the beginning of true acceptance.

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